My fist, Your Face, an introduction

Your Face meet My Fist.
My Fist is very pleased to meet you.
My Fist hopes the experience is as pleasant for you, as it is for my fist.
My Fist was been wanting to meet you for a long time.
In fact, My Fist has been counting the days down on a little calendar,
crossing days off with a red sharpie marker.
Personally, I’ve never seen My Fist so excited before today.
Ahh, it looks like I’ve embarrassed My Fist.
Look at how red My Fist is!
But Your Face is bleeding I think.
I hope everything is ok.
This always happens to My Fist.
I can’t take My Fist anywhere.